Sunday, September 27, 2009
Daybook: Seeking Peace
Right now...I am typing and holding the baby boy that should be sleeping in his bed. Its been nearly three days of near constant holding. His panicked, anguished cries when I set him down for even just a moment are heartbreaking. Not sure why he needs me so right now, but I find if I get frustrated about what I "can't" accomplish while holding him I lose sight of what I am accomplishing...meeting the needs of my little boy. No small accomplishment at all.
In a little while...we'll try bedtime again.
This week...All the usual stuff. This week will probably include just about every activity possible...sigh...I'm must admit I'm struggling a bit with not feeling like I'm constantly running away from a tidal wave. I need to be careful as I hear the chorus of "I will not burn out. I will not burn out..." playing repeatedly in my head. Is it a warning or a prediction...don't know yet.
Birthdays...On Tuesday my Aggie is three! Three! She is such a delight. I love most how all her siblings love telling the stories of the newest clever thing she says in her lispy voice. It is also Grandpa's birthday. Grandma's is today. Then Abuelo and cousin Lindsay on Thursday. And then cousin Maggie next week.
Fall...really here now. So many things to bake! I love autumn.
Living the Liturgy...We'll celebrate the Archangels of course! And Therese, special to our family and our little co-op. And St. Francis, for Carmen, my animal lover.
Hmmm, I wanted to share about a wonderful perfect moment of peace after Communion today. It was so brief, but full of grace...I think I need to hold on to it this week, to remind me of His peace and grace, ever present, if I only remember to rely on it.
The other thing I'm pondering this week is piety. I have moments when I worry how well am I really passing along the faith to the children. More importantly, are they truly growing in friendship with our Lord. Mercifully, God gives me the tiniest glimpses to assure me His grace is present. Lately it is through Carmen. She is so sweet and sensitive. Watching her attentiveness and devotion at Mass is so beautiful. In the past weeks she has decided to wear her scapular all the time. This is not a devotion we have cultivated in our home. She simply felt drawn to it and so she did it. I smile to think of the work of the Holy Spirit going on in my girl's soul. And again I pray for the grace to let Him work, gently and secretly in her heart.
In the schoolroom...Despite the relentless pace of life...oh my, can I say it and not jinx it? Our world studies are so much fun and I can't believe how much we're learning. Is it true? Are all the kids really in a rhythm? Pretty much. So much I could share, but the once sleepy baby seems to be getting his second wind, so I think my time is getting limited.
I'll share this now. How amazing to see my Maddy mature and come into her own educationally. She is conscientious and precise about completing her work. She is eager to be challenged intellectually. I love talking to her about what she's learning. Maybe I'll be able to post what we chose for her for this year.
John...yeah, really awake now and chatting. Size will not stop this boy and I'm trying to figure out how to baby proof for a tiny boy ready to explore his world. I also need to get over my anxiety about it. He's 9 months! And now he wants to type, so its time to go.