The painful paradox is that while women have liberated themselves from being defined by their biology - the fate of the girl in many African and Asian societies who is not truly a woman until she has given birth - mothers have ended up relegated to the status of constant abject failure in a culture driven by consumerism and workaholism. There is no kudos in being a mum, only in being other things - such as thin, or the boss - despite being a mum. Motherhood is a form of handicap.Do read the rest of this article in The Guardian.
I became a mother at a somehat young age, never having my own career and starting married life very poor. Not only that, we kept having babies, much to many people's concern and consternation (albeit well meaning). I am not a saint, but I think this start never gave me much time to pity myself or feel anxious about what I was losing or perhaps would never have. I know many young women, with a deep desire to have children, who nevertheless bought into the consumerism and workaholism of our age, and they have struggled even when presented with their beloved child. They're surpised that no one's around to tell them what a great job they do, how invaluable they are and that the bonus is coming soon.
What a wonderful thing it has been for me to fail in society. The prize of who my children are becoming is a prize I will take anytime.